It's Sunday. It's a beautiful sunny day outside. I'm sitting here in my family room just loving the warmth from the sun beams. Thank God for sunshine. I'm doing everything I can to lift my own spririts today....Trying to read magazines, have scented oil lit for the aromatherapy factor, trying to de-stress before the children come home at 5pm.
Although a good chunk of my 3 weeks off will be piled with the stress of my ex's most recent stunt, I'm still going to try to keep focused. I'm going to stick to the plan of going to the gym every weekday and journaling every day. I'll deal with the legal crap in whatever time is left in the day outside of those activities. The last thing I want is to go back to work 3 weeks from now even more stressed than ever.
I have an awesome friend who was kind enough to take a look at my separation agreement and give me some advice. He has his LLB but never took the bar, so he's technically not a lawyer, but in my opinion, he might as well be. He was kind enough to download all the forms for me and fill them all out. I spoke to his wife, who is one of my dearest friends, and she told me that all I have to do is sign the papers and go to the court to file them. That will kick off the dispute portion around child support. It's just the beginning of what I'm about to face yet again, but it's so awesome to know that somebody out there cared enough to do all the initial legwork for me. Talk about golden friends, huh?
I spent a few hours with a good friend yesterday. It was the first time in a long time that I was able to forget things for a few hours. This stuff wasn't even in the back of my mind. That was very promising and I think it calmed me down just a bit.
So here's the plan for today- de-stress, sign the paperwork, and play with the kids. Tomorrow, I'll go to the courts to file, go to the gym, and then spend the evening with the children. Tuesday, I'm sure, will have it's own drama.
My goal for this week is to get it into my ex's head that his recent stunt around child support has nothing to do with the divorce papers. I want the papers signed on Friday and the proceedings scheduled in the courts. I want that to proceed on track. The financial stuff will have to be dealt with separately. The last thing I need is to have the financial stuff and the divorce delaying one another. Let's at least get one thing off my plate so I can feel like everything is not hanging in the air. Some sense of normalcy would be nice right about now.
I cannot understand how any human being on the face of this earth could be so cruel. Abusive to his wife, financially destructive, and then just torturing me by delaying the divorce and playing financial games so that I'm in a position where I don't even know if I can make my next mortgage payment. This is just wrong. This is why so many women stay in bad marriages.
Fortunately for me, I'm not the typical single mom. I have a good career, an amazing network of friends and fantastic resources at my disposal. Yes, I'm stressed, but as my dad said to me yesterday "what are you worried about? As long as you have so many people who love you, you will be just fine. No man can take away who you are, or what you are capable of achieving. Once he gets that through his head, he will have no choice but to give up and to leave you alone. Then you will be able to move on". You go daddy. You rock. It is so awesome how my dad can always manage to reassure me.
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