Good God. I am so very tired of this game with the ex. Every day a different story, every day a new kind of drama. Some days when he comes to drop the children off on a Sunday, I have to hear about how horrible I am, and how he's moving on, and how happy he will be when the divorce is final. Then there are the nights like tonight when he comes in all clingy and needy asking if I'm sure I don't want to re-consider things and possibly reconcile.
Fortunately for me (and I NEVER thought I would say this), my nightmares of the abuse are very vivid, very strong, and are making me sleep deprived and yes cranky. The thought of reconciling ever since I've been re-living everything is just insane.
I looked at him tonight and really wanted to say- yes I would love to reconcile...More black eyes please...But thought, no let's take the high road and not be salty here. I feel sorry for him, and yet I can't stand him...What a weird twisted mix that is. So I politely declined the oh-so-wonderful offer and closed the door as he left.
I'm gonna need therapy for LIFE. This sucks. I marry a bi-polar nut job and I'm the one who will end up in the looney bin. Nice. Real nice.
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