Away from their Dad

The kids haven't seen their dad in about 3 months time.  After standing up to him in December and telling him that it was not OK for him to stress them out and boss them around, they asked to have some space from him.   I think he took that as a slap in the face.  I think he expected them to take his side.  And his response- no contact.  No phone calls, no requests to patch up a relationship.  He even refused to meet with the CAS.  My understanding is that the CAS is continuing to reach out to him.  He told them in December that he doesn't want anything to do with the children.

The next thing- an email he sent to me saying that he is basically not mentally well, and that he is unable to pay child support because he is not employed.  I was married to the deadbeat, so it's not unlike him to shirk out of financial responsibilities.

Not the biggest surprise.  I'm guessing this was always about money.  He never cared for anything except eliminating the child support.  I doubt he ever seriously wanted more time with the children.  I guess if he didn't get it one way, and now that the children have refused to see him, he's trying to get it another way.

For the moment, I'm enjoying the peace.  It's financially difficult, but let's face it, he always was a deadbeat dad.  I think my next step will be to register with the family responsibility office.

Never a dull moment.  What a sack of dirt.

40 Already?

I turned 40 last week.  That was an interesting milestone for me.  Kind of left me with mixed feelings.  On the one hand, I felt thankful- I have wonderful children, I have exceptional friends, and despite the many challenges that have come my way, I am still standing.  It hasn't always been easy, and I have had my share of breakdowns, but I'm still alive, and so far I'm well.

On the other hand, I had a few not so nice people remind me that it "only goes downhill from here", that "gravity kicks in" at 40, and oh yes, my personal favorite "it's been 8 years since your divorce- when will live ever be stable?"  ---seriously?  Have you seen my asshole ex?  Cut me some slack here.

Anyhow, trying to ignore the negativity...trying to be positive.

On a really positive note, my sister threw me one heck of a diva birthday party.  That was pretty darned fabulous.  It was a dinner with the diva women around me, the ones I have come to love and adore.  It was great to have all that lovely female support on a day when I really needed it.  There was a reason that party was for women only.  It was a lovely reminder of the strength and power we gain from the sisterhood of women.  God bless each and every one of them.