The Ex's New Look

I got a call from a friend today who wanted to know if I've seen my ex's latest "look". The answer is yes I have. He was apparently much more amused by the look than I was. He thought the 'Jason Priestly' sideburns that have been busting out are way too funny. I think it's good for my ex. It's funny because all the while I was thinking to myself...well, I look different now too. I've been looking after myself more as well. Oddly enough, we've both moved in the same direction. He's shed some of the traditional Muslim look as have I. My friend was kind enough to say it's not the same thing...but I disagree. I think it's very much the same.

I guess that's what happens when you get divorced...you change some things about yourself, or you become more conscious of how you look and feel. I don't think it's a conscious effort to attract anyone or anything like that. (OK- well, pot shot, but in his case I think it's definitely a conscious effort to attract others), but for me, it was more about wanting to look good and feel good because I wanted to prove to myself and to the world that I would be better off without him. Looking and feeling better is the first step to genuinely being better off I suppose. But for him, it's all about attracting women, and he even said it to me, which I found very amusing.

His recent changes (all of which are good in my opinion) are:

• lost weight (at least 20 lbs)
• more muscular and active, involved in sports
• shaved off the beard. This is a huge deal if you're from the Muslim community, but hey, I took off the scarf, so who the heck am I to talk? Apparently I'm destined for hell for my decision, so apparently, my former hubby and I will end up in the same place. How ironic is that? Life sucks doesn't it?
• grew in the Jason Priestly sideburns. OK- they look OK on him, but I did laugh the first time I saw them. I asked him what the heck he was doing, and he said his hairdresser told him to do it cuz the "chicks dig it". Um, maybe they did in 1980...but whatever suits your fancy buddy...
  
• new clothes, paying more attention to what he wears...trying to lose the slob look

OK well, aside from the sideburns which are questionable, I think everything else is OK for him. I personally think the goatee suited him better, but who the heck cares, it's not like I'm chasing him. Truthfully, I don't care who does end up with him, as long as she's good to my kids. And, the sooner he moves on, the sooner he is out of my life. Then it's party time for real.

OK...Let's be fair. I've made my fair share of changes too, none of which were major, except for losing the scarf. My friends would say that I'm going to hell, but that's debatable. I do enjoy having my hair back, and it makes a gigantic difference on appearance, as well as having a major impact on how I relate with the world around me.

Anyhow, it's all just food for thought. We all have different reasons for making the changes that we make. Some are better than others, but if the net result is positive, I say go for it.

I'm sure my friend will have a thing or two to add...Go ahead honey...take a pot shot.