I took the children to an office Christmas party today. Please don't judge. I can just hear it- Oh look! The Muslim Girl who doesn't celebrate Christmas took her kids to a Christmas party. I actually didn't intend to do it, as I was afraid of further confusion around Religion, but I ended up doing it for a couple of reasons. Firstly, my children go to public school which means they are exposed to other religions anyways. Secondly, I want them to grow up learning that we should respect all faiths, and still also be able to respect our own. Thirdly- they outright asked me if my company has an office party, and when I told them yes, they asked why I never take them. I explained that we don't celebrate Christmas, and they asked why we can't just go to the party and have fun with all the other children. That got me to thinking- yeah, why not? I mean - it's not like avoiding Christmas will make it go away or be less visible, and while I know many who would insist that participating in it just confuses the kids further, I don't know if I agree with that.
I have friends from many different faiths and I've always taught the children that there are many religions in the world, and that we are all sort of branches of the same tree at the end of the day. Different paths to get us hopefully to the same destination. Anyhow, I had fun at the party, and so did the children. I also learned something today. Despite how much everyone has told me that exposing children to multiple religions will confuse them, I'm not sure that's true. Anyhow, I went to this party which actually was a show for children, a spin off of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas", followed by face painting, jumping castles, etc. The children had a blast. There was really just one part of the event that I was a little concerned about...The part where the children got a chance to have their pictures taken with Santa. They also had the option of getting a picture with the actors of the show. Thankfully, they opted for the actors.
At the end of the day, just as we were leaving, the children caught sight of Santa at the photo booth and asked if they could say hello. I said yes and watched them go over, casually say "Hi Santa- how are you?" He said fine, and asked how they were doing. They responded that they were fine, he gave them a candy cane, and we were off on our way. No big deal at all. I expected a whole bunch of questions around why Santa doesn't visit Muslim homes, or why we don't have Christmas lights up, and I was fully prepared to answer them, but the need never came up.
In fact, its funny. On the way home, my children asked me "even though we don't celebrate Christmas, can we give presents to people who do?" I told them yes, that it was nice to acknowledge other people's religious beliefs, and to be extra considerate during their holidays. I told them I was buying gifts for the neighbors. They were delighted and asked if they could hand them out. I said yes. They were happy.
Sometimes I think we expect the worst. In my opinion, this day went over really well. I feel like I've taught my children that we can still have a different faith yet be respectful of others, participate with them, and still have fun along the way. I don't want them to grow up anal or ethnocentric. At the end of the day, these are the children of two Torontonian born parents. If nothing else, they should be able to grow up with a respect for multiculturalism and for all religions across the board. I'm hoping that I can at least contribute to that in some way, without appearing like an iron fisted brick wall parent. That's really not me. I think the more we push children in one direction, the more they will rebel, and the more we encourage them to being respectful and understanding of the world that surrounds us and the incredibly beautiful diversity within it, the better equipped they will be to succeed in it, to appreciate it, and to become well-rounded people within it.
At the end of the day, Religion is a funny thing. Its kind of a double-edged sword. It has many benefits, as it guides our daily lives, gives us moral boundaries, and a sense of reward for being good people. On the other hand, some people tend to get so obsessed by it that they end up fighting, killing, hurting, and building walls between people, communities and nations. I really don't want to see any of that in my children, so I think a good first step is teaching them to respect our faith, just as much as we respect everyone else's. And hey- having a little fun at some of these parties along the way never hurts either. Life's short, too short to waste time arguing over the trivial things. And while we're at it, bring on the candy canes and jumping castles. Any excuse to play. :-)
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