Almost there

I NEVER thought I'd ever say this...But I cannot wait for this weekend to be over. I cannot wait for Monday to be here, because then, I will have finished all this audit prep, and although I will be exhausted, I will be human again. This is pure hell.

I don't think I've done this to my body since way back in my undergraduate years. Working all day and night nonstop to get stuff documented and overwith. I had forgotten how this feels. Its crap. Why would anyone subject themselves to this? If I see another piece of paper that says "risk plan" or "process" on it again, my head is going to crack open and a bunch of little creatures are going to come out and start dancing on the tables and chairs and wreaking havoc on the universe (ever see the movie "gremlins"?)

Yes, I know, I'm dating myself, but that's the image I have in my head. Except my creatures will probably be dancing to the macerena while wreaking havoc. Don't ask. Its almost 2am and I've only slept about 6 hours in the past 48. What do I know?

Well, I know that I'm glad the kids are at their dad's this weekend. Glad for them that is. I also know that sitting in trackpants for 2 days in a row with eyeglasses and no makeup feels really nasty. I also know that I've become so obsessed that I've resorted to eating Frosted Flakes for breakfast, lunch, and dinner until I get this done. Now that's sick. What the hell is wrong with me? I'll tell you one thing, I DO NOT miss those university days. Frosted Flakes for dinner. What a concept. Its almost funny- I can think of a million times when I've told the children "no, you may NOT have cereal for dinner, because that's just wrong". But here I am- Frosted Flakes for dinner.

You know what? I was right- This is sooooo wrong. The other pathetic thing is that I have plenty of stuff I could eat sitting right there in the fridge, but I go for Frosted Flakes. I dunno. Its 2am. Don't even try asking me to explain all this. I'm tired. And the weird thing is, given how sick I've been lately, I REALLY should not be doing this to myself. I mean, I'm still undergoing tests for this insane ulcer, and I'm making myself sleep deprived and messing up my eating habits. But oddly enough, as an aside, one thing I do know is that all those Frosted flakes have worked wonders on the ulcer. Go figure. Must be all that milk. And sugar. OK - Now thinking of all that sugar, I just feel even nastier. I think I'm gonna be sick...

I bet when Monday comes, I will have done all this magical perfect documentation and nobody will ask for any of it. I have to tell you, if that happens, I'm going to have the biggest massive freak-O attack on the planet. I can just see myself running up to the auditors hurling stacks of paper at them yelling "you MUST read this. Its perfection, Dammit!!!!". That's when the nice men come with the white straightjacket just for me. But hey, I bet that will get me a few days of uninterrupted sleep :-)

Gosh I need sleep. I'm outta here. Almost done. 24 hours to go, and the pathetic thing is, nobody has a clue how much work I'm doing. If a tree falls in the forest, does anybody hear? Well if I do all this documentation and nobody knows, does anybody care? Hmmmm I'm starting to feel really suckered right now...