The Court Order

Well, it looks like I got what I’ve been waiting for. I checked the mail today and found the papers from the courts. The papers were a bit confusing, but basically the gist of it is that the judge signed the papers on June 2. My divorce is effective 31 days after that date, at which point I am eligible to go to the courts for an official divorce certificate. July 3 will be 31 days, and July 3 is a holiday here (long weekend), so the first day when I can go to the courts is July 4^th. I will be going on July 4^th. I guess in some ways it’s a bit appropriate that there are fireworks on that date…in the US anyways. In other ways, it’s not so appropriate at all.

Receiving the notice from the courts was a bit of a weird feeling. I hate seeing our marriage date next to the words “effective date of divorce”. It just feels so odd, and yes, it did make me a bit teary eyed. May 29, 1993 was our wedding date. June 2 2006 is the date the divorce order was signed, making it effective July 3^rd 2006. To many people, these are just dates. To me, they are a sign of things lost- my youth, the prime years of my life, my innocence. I’m going to have a much harder time trusting again. I’m not saying it won’t happen eventually, but it will be harder. The only good thing that came from this marriage is my children. Thank God for them.

It’s very sad when a marriage comes to an end. I spent today just wondering how any man could hurt a woman this much. Why was he not able to love me? Why did I waste so many years of my life? Why did I care so much about someone who so obviously never really cared back?

I suppose it doesn’t matter anymore. I spoke to a friend today and he said to remember that this is the start of a new time in my life, and that I deserve to be happy, and that I will be happy. Thank God for the reassurance. Let’s just hope it’s all true.

So my friends, less than two weeks and it will all be official. Thanks for helping me to get here, and for supporting me in my tough moments. I hope I’ll never have to repay the favour (I would wish only the best for my friends), but if any of you need my support for something in your lives, you can bet I’ll be there by your side.