Stargazer Lilies

Stargazer Lilies are my favourite flower. There is only one person who ever figured that one out, and that was recently, and kind of by accident. I've loved the flower for years...It has a fragrant smell, and it's big and beautiful. My ex didn't know it was my favourite flower. I never had the heart to tell him. When we were 16 I absolutely loved pink roses. My ex knew that. So, whenever he bought me flowers, they usually included pink roses. I found the gesture so thoughtful that I never wanted to burst his bubble and tell him that I was growing tired of the pink roses. No worries...The thought of him going out of his way to buy me what he thought was my favourite flower was more than enough for me.

Anyhow, when I put the offer on this house, I noticed the stargazer lilies planted in the front garden. Maybe 20 or 30 of them. This was like an omen to me. I loved the outside of the house before I even stepped foot inside. I felt like it called to me. I know...I'm being dramatic and emotional, but that's how it was. And it was a dramatic and emotional experience. Purchasing your first new home after a divorce- the first thing that is actually all your very own was a very big deal.

Anyhow, this year, the lilies came out around the time of the divorce (July 4th). I noticed them in the garden and smiled every time I saw them, but I never took the time to actually sit outside and enjoy them or to enjoy their fragrance. I kept saying tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.

This morning, I was putting the children outside and I noticed that the petals have fallen off the last lily. I never even took the time to enjoy them. How sad. Perhaps it was the heat, maybe I didn't water them enough, or maybe it's just the fact that stargazer lilies only live for a few weeks, and these were around for 3 whole weeks. I just didn't enjoy them. I was so caught up in the details around the divorce, the paperwork, etc....That I just didn't make the time to stop and enjoy, even if just for a few short seconds.

I'm not being hard on myself or anything. Just observing. I promised to always take time to smell the flowers, and this time, I didn't do it...Literally. Next year, I'm going to sit on the porch and read right there, so that I can enjoy the flowers for the short time that they are around.